24. June 2008 by Julie.

Hello all.  My doctor appointment went well.  He wants me to go for non-stress tests every week to make sure the baby is still doing okay.  I think he’s puting my mind at ease also. I’m 33 wks already, so time is coming near.  I finally went out and bought onesies and a diapers but that’s about it.  I’m just busy trying to get all our projects finished up so we have no more sanding to do or painting.  Almost there.  My bought me my bassinet/pack-n-play.  She said the baby needed a place to sleep when it came home.  I guess she’s right. (haha)  I don’t know why I’m so un motivated. I feel like I have so much time when I actually am running out of time.  I guess its true by the time its your 3rd or 4th kid you get laxed. Oh well, I look at life so much different now,  just go with the flow.  Remember back in the day when I said I would have “closet time”?  Then it moved to “shower time”?  Well, I have been having a lot of them lately.  I’ll be washing my hair, thinking of something with the neighbors and then boom…..a flashback of Jessica pops in my head. And its always the grim things.  Maybe that’s why I feel that I am having a boy. Maybe Jessie watching out for me so I won’t be comparing or looking into a girl’s eyes and seeing Jess.  I wish I could just cuddle with her. I miss her so much. And yes it has gotten better over time but it still feels almost like yesterday that she was here.  Anyhoot, thanks for checking in.  Tom is going to try to update this page .  I think he’s sick of hearing me complain.  New people who say they have stumbled across this have no idea of Jessie’s journey.  So he’s going to try to put a history part on here plus a photot area.  Well, have a great week and enjoy your weekend. Please say some prayers for so many children out there battling to get better. Hold the ones who have lost close to your hearts.  Especially Jessie and Anna.  Signing off….

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18. June 2008 by Julie.

Hello, finally our last day was yesterday!!  It was the longest year ever!  Although it was a good year, just long.  So now I have to try to keep Thomas busy so he doesn’t sit around playing video games.  I did sign him up 3 mornings a week for the Jr swim team and a day camp for a week in July that a few of his friends are in, so that should be fun for him.  Plus baseball is still in action and before you know it in the beginning of Aug starts football.  Hopefully the weeks will go by and this baby will be born!!  My dad came in for a few days to visit.  Helped us with some projects.  No, I haven’t started on Jessie’s room.  I need to start getting a few items for the baby, like something to bring it home in. And a car seat would be a necessity also. I’m still feeling okay but I’m having a lot of braxton Hicks and pressure on my stitch.  I know I need to start taking it easy now.  I have been reaal uncomfortable the last few days.  I think this baby is coming early.  Well, I just wanted to say hello.  I ahve a doctors appointment on Thursday.  If he says anything new, I’ll post a message.  Thanks for checking in.  Hope everyone is enjoying their summer.  I know I will be.  We are trying to add some pics to this page also.  Not sure if we are able to but will try.

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9. June 2008 by Julie.

Hi guys,

What a long weekend.  We had a lot of baseball and spent most of it in the parking lot waiting for the lightning or rain to subside.  But when we did get to play Thomas did so well.  He plays 1 st base and sometimes right field.  I love to watch him. Everytime he does well he looks over at Tom and I and gives us the “thumbs up”.   Wanted to do some yard work but didn’t have the time or energy.  I’m so far behind when it comes to my flowers and mulch this year.  Of course, the weather hasn’t been on our side either. 

Well, I’m still feeling good but I’ve been having a  lot of Braxton Hicks. Doc says its normal and everything checks out fine but they have been pretty strong and I’ve never had them before.  I’m 31 wks now so I’m on my way soon. Thomas can’t wait.  He says its going to be the best birthday present ever.  His birthday is a few weeks before the baby is due.  But both kids will be born in July.  This week my dad is coming in from Orlando for a week.  So I’m doing some major cleaning in my guest bedroom since there are maternity clothes scattered through out.  Plus I think its time to do the job of cleaning out Jessie’s room.  I’ve asked Tom to help me because I get anxiety just thinking about it.  Its not so much her actual room as its all the “post” Minnesota clothes and her bedding and pillow that upsets me.  Even as much as her socks and pajamas in her drawers.  I still have a small pile of T-shirts that she wore the last few weeks that I could never wash or put away.  The “smell”.  I wish Che could be here to help me. I wish Jessie could be back laying in her bed again.  That’s why I’m so worried when the doctor tells us what sex the baby is and I’ll be disappointed if its not a girl.  I know that sounds bad but I’m mixed.  Of course I don’t care as long as its healthy but in one way I just want my girl.  I’ve lost two, so why can’t I just have one more?  Sometimes I think maybe its better if I did have a boy.  That way I won’t compare the baby to Jessie or who knows.  I ask Jessie to give me whatever she thinks would help me.  I leave it up to her.  She knows what’s best.  I do believe she has her hands in this all.  Well, thank you for checking in.  Its nice to have you all back again.  June 17th is our last day at school.  Can’t wait.  Then we have so much to do for this baby.  Hope you all have a great week.  Say some prayers for our sick kids and keep Jessie in your hearts.

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3. June 2008 by Julie.

Hello all.  Well the nicer weather has finally arrived.  Let’s hope it stays now.  Things are still hectic around here. I’m feeling okay.  Just very uncomfortable.  Its my stretching skin that kills me. Plus the further I’m along I’m feeling my cerclage more.  It grosses me out. But I think we’ve decided to take the baby during the last week in July.  I’ll be 38 wks. I’m not sure if you remember but my donor is also pregnant.  Infact, she’s 4 weeks behind me.  She’s doing real well too.  What a neat experience. Especially if we both have the same sex baby.  We call and complain about the same things or discuss all our food cravings.  Its fun.  So a few of my friends mentioned a baby shower for me since I don’t have anything except baby spoons and blankets.  So I went to register at Babys R Us and wow!!,  Didn’t realize all the new, neat, and fun gadgets there are for babys.  It was so fun.  I did however, feel like the oldest mom registering. But oh well.  As long as I can have a healthy baby to use all these things with, I don’t care.  Well, I know a few of you have been concerned with Che because of her website being down but I did talk to her yesterday and everything is going just fine.  I forgot to ask her about the website but she just graduated over the weekend.  She’s done with school now.  Congrats to her!!  Anna’s birthday is coming up soon.  June 24th she would have been 4.  So I know she is getting bugged by that.  But she did say that she is coming out her when I have the baby.  I’m so excited for that. We need our yearly visit.   Well we have 11 more days of school.  Not short enough but looking forward to getting OUT!  I trying to return to work next yera.  I know some people say I’m crazy but its Thomas’s last year in elementary and I thought I  would work one more year before he goes off to middle school.  Besides, I’m only there from 8-2:30.  Not very long.  And  by the time we are out for summer next year the baby will only be 10 months. That will be perfect to stay home then.  But who knows I need to find a sitter first.  So that is what’s happening here at the Tucker household.  Thanks for checking in.  I still love to read all your messages.  Take care and have a great night.

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